Archive, 2nd Half of 2004

12/29/2004:
A long time since an update. A lot has been going on. Joanna arrived back on 12/17, and I will say without caution life has been that much brighter since her arrival. My life truly feels complete with her here. I look forward to when there is no "time limit" on our time together. Just another 18 months or so. Sounds like a short time when I say it that way. And so it is.

My Christmas went very well. Meghan was unable to make it home, for she had to work, but we talked to her several times over the holiday, enforcing the love and good thoughts spread to her despite her absence. Joanna was taken in as a member of the family for the holidays, and so she felt, and was given even more happiness for it. The presents were plentiful and thoughtful, and I will admit I like the materials I received, the love and joyfulness felt for the holiday was most important to me. The five of us (Joanna, myself, Mom, Dad, and my grandmother) even attended the Christmas Eve service at the Baptist Church, and it was beautiful. My singing was quite off that night - I just could seem to get into the flow of the music - but I don't think anyone cared :) While there, I was able to briefly reconnect with some old friends, a few I hadn't seen in 8 years (since I graduated from high school). I did pick up a couple of email addresses, and will be sending emails soon :) The only thing that bothered me about Christmas was the lack of snow. I strongly dislike having a "brown christmas". It did finally snow on sunday, during our drive back to MA. At least that was something. And it was certainly pretty :)

Work continues on my D&D campaign world. I have now detailed out two new cities, and a good portion of a third. I hope we get to play this friday (New Year's Eve). I have to work, but may get out early if it is slow. I was invited to a party on Long Island, but will not be going this year. I hope to make plans soon to gather with my friends there on the island (and draw those in from outside the island as well), but it will not be this weekend.

Work is slow this week, as I thought it might be. This has given me plenty of time to read, and I have no complaints about it. I received The Dark Tower for Christmas. This is the 7th, and final, book in the Dark Tower series by Stephen King; a series 34 years in the making. The story is captivating and very well written, and I look forward to reading more of it when I finish this much-needed update. The book is 845 pages in length, and already I have read to page 567. I may clear 600 before the day is out. The story is powerful, to the point of affecting my dreams last night (as powerful stories do). It also inspires my imagination, which I love, and no doubt pieces of the tale will be tucked away by my own mind for later use, in my campaign, perhaps, or in stories of my own.

I feel there was more I wished to write here, after so long since an update, but there is little else coming right now. My spirit energies are awakened, as is my imagination. This can only mean there will be more to come, soon, on one medium or another. Hopefully the next update will not be so long in the making :)


12/11/2004:

In just 6 days, Joanna will be here. I truly cannot wait for the moment when I am able to view her in the flesh once again, instead of remotely, from hundreds of miles away. The mere thought makes my flesh tingle, and tears spring to my eyes, for my longing, my need, is great.

The week has been productive. I finally got my own desk at work, so I need not wonder where I will sit when I go in each day. I like having a place to store my belongings and papers that I need to reference on a daily basis at work. I find I am more relaxed at work now that I have a place to call my own. I was also productive during work, while not on calls, working on my D&D campaign world. It had been a few months since I had done much in the way of planning. I worked on some plot details (which may come into play next session), and also detailed another city on the surface of my world. I still have many cities left to detail, but I am slowly advancing through them. It gives me a great sense of accomplishment to do this work, and of course leaves me wanting to play my campaign as soon as possible :) It's going to be at least a couple of weeks before we can all get together and play. Whenever the time is available, it will be most enjoyable :)

I loaded up Doom3 again this week, and started playing through the game on Nightmare difficulty. It really is a nightmare! For starters, my marine is constantly losing health, as if he is bleeding from several wounds that cannot be patched up. I lose 5 health per tick, each tick being a few seconds apart. This loss of life is constant, as long as my health total exceeds 25. Once I get down to 25, the constant loss of life stops. Of course, this doesn't stop me from taking damage from the many creatures I encounter (usually resulting in death, since I'm so low on health). I have yet to see a health pack anywhere, though I have found a few health dispensers mounted on the walls. When playing on Nightmare difficulty, one starts out having the Soul Cube, which allows the draining of life from enemies. The life drained is transferred to your health total. This is a necessary item for the marine that is constantly losing health, even when no enemies are present. I have noticed already that the creatures are more numerous on this difficulty, and I am meeting with tougher enemies earlier in the game. I'm only a few sections in, and I'm already being shot at by zombie soldiers and pounced on by imps. I am determined to finish the game on this difficulty, but it is likely to take me quite some time. I do like the game, though, and enjoy a challenge. A challenge it certainly is!

Page Updates:
- added "Weep" to Scribble
- added "Guardian" to Scribble


12/05/2004:

The weekend has been very productive so far. I'm still feeling sniffly, but overall much healthier than during last week. Yesterday, I got out and got most of my Christmas shopping done, then came home and wrapped the gifts :) Today, I did the online ordering I needed to, so now I just need to wait for those packages to arrive so I can wrap their contents, but the buying is pretty much done :)

Since I was sick last week, I didn't feel up to doing anything around the apartment (besides laying on the couch or in bed). Last night, I felt motivated to clean, so I vacuumed through the rooms. Today, I got up and cleaned the bathroom and kitchen, and reorganized some stuff. This left me feeling very accomplished, and therefore quite content :) Later, I am to get together with some friends, which no doubt will be enjoyable. I did get to see Steph and Pandora (separately) for awhile yesterday, and it was good. Steph and I watched the third Harry Potter movie, which neither of us had seen yet. Pandora and I spent our time talking, as per usual :)

I did finally finish reading Neal Stephenson's Crytonomicon a couple weeks ago. The book was very good, but, in my opinion, the ending left quite a bit to be desired. Since finishing the book, I have started reading the Left Behind series. It is Christian fiction, detailing the time after the rapture (when Christ returns to take all the true Christians to heaven), and what life is like on earth for those left behind. It is a very interesting read, and I'm learning quite a bit about the Christian view of things to come (at least from the point of view of the two authors). It should allow for some interesting discussions with my friends in the future. I am still unsure of my beliefs where all that is concerned; I haven't ever given much thought to creation or end-of-the-world ideas, as far as different religions are concerned. All I know is that if our defense fails (see dragon-rider.us main page), it will be the end of life on earth as we know it.

I have been feeling spiritually empowered the past few days. I'm sure some of it has to do with my current reading material. Even though I'm reading about things I do not necessarily believe, I am still gaining spiritual knowledge, and that makes me feel more powerful within my own spheres. I have also been doing more dream travel lately; as I grow healthier, I often travel more. I have also been empowered in my own personal dreams, with magick and also with psionic ability. I feel I need to focus these energies on something within my waking life. My rune studies have been very lacking in the past few months, and I expect I will return to them soon; it would be good for me to become more familiar with the runes and their power, for my own personal well-being and for the well-being of those I watch over.

Page Updates
- added Links section to Dragon-Rider page (though there is only one link there so far)


12/01/2004:

First off, I guess it was kinda stupid of me to think anyone would be open on Thanksgiving day. I got up at 7:30 and drove around to a couple vehicle repair shops in the area (my brake chime dinging away the whole time, of course), and they were all closed. I also learned quickly thereafter that the fuse I found did not, in fact, stop the chime from coming on. So much for that idea. So I got my stuff together and started home. Thankfully, the chime went away, and did not bother me all the way up the highway into VT. As soon as I got off the highway, however, it started up again, and didn't go away until I turned off my car upon reaching my parents' house. My Dad had one of his friends look at my car while I was in VT. Lo and behold, it was not my emergency brake causing all the trouble at all...I was low on brake fluid, and apparently my car uses the e-brake chime to tell me this. You'd think they would have room for a "low on brake fluid" light, but apparently it wasn't important enough to warrant having a separate warning for. *sigh*

We had Thanksgiving for the whole family at my parents' house this year. We ended up having about 25 people over for dinner. It was really nice to see everyone there, and all had a good time. I was able to spend some quality time with my cousins, both young and old (especially the younger ones); something I do not get to do very often at all. After dinner, I spent some time playing pool with Jason, Ashley, Michael, Meghan-Ray, and Junior. It was great fun. Later in the evening, Jeff and Chris showed up; it is always great to see them :) Throughout the weekend, I spent some great time with my family and close friends, helped my Mom out with quite a few things around the house, and got to relax, all of which made for a great Thanksgiving holiday weekend :)

Unfortunately, I also picked up a cold over the weekend, which followed me into this week. I only worked 1/2 a day on monday, and took yesterday off, as I was feeling pretty damn crappy (fine when laying down, miserable when doing anything else). Today I was somewhat better, and managed to make it through an entire day at work. I plan to get to bed early again tonight, and hopefully feel much better tomorrow. I did receive some good news at work today: I am starting my new schedule on monday, working 11 am - 8 pm, still monday - friday. I am looking forward to this schedule change; it will be better for my overall health and well-being, not having to be up so early each morning, and also avoiding rush hour traffic.


11/24/2004:

My weekend went pretty well. We played D&D (Pete's campaign) on friday night, which went well. Steph isn't playing with us anymore, so I played two characters that night: my own rogue, and her sorceress. I will play her until there is an opportunity for the character to break cleanly from the party (or until something else occurs which removes her from my control). We have finally achieved 3rd level :) Here comes weapon finesse for my rogue :)

On saturday, I attended a little get together, hosted at Steph's place. We watched some anime - the Inuyasha movie, and Slayers Premium. I enjoyed the Inuyasha movie - it provided enough information about the characters that I could follow what was going on without ever having watched the show. I didn't care much for Slayers Premium; the animation for the spells was nice, but the humor was way too silly for my taste.

After spending a few hours at Steph's, I went over to Pandora's place. This was our first time meeting each other in person, and we got along very well. I wasn't really surprised at this; I had a feeling, since first reading her journal online, that we would get along great if we ever came together. I was certainly not disappointed in any way :) I spent about 6 hours or so with her, looking through her collection of books and games, and delving deep into some very interesting conversation. We spoke a lot about the unity of humanity, how important it is to both of us, and how necessary it is for the world at large. I look forward to the next time we can get together.

So, my car's newest thing is telling me the emergency brake is engaged, when it's not. It wouldn't be so bad if it just declared this with the little red light that says "Brake"; no, it has to go *dingdingdingdingdingdingdingdingding* all the time the light is on. This started on sunday, on my way over to Larry's to play in Kris' World of Darkness game. Roland was with me at the time. We stopped at 7-11, so I could play in the fuse box for awhile. After doing so, the light and dinging went away. It tried to come back a couple times on the way home, but failed. It didn't reappear on monday. Then, yesterday, it came on on the way to work, for a few minutes, then went away. It came back on for my drive home, and stayed on allll the way home. And all the way back to work today. And all the way back home today. I am praying Midas is open tomorrow morning so I can take it in and at least have them turn the dinger off before I drive to VT for Thanksgiving. If they are not open, I'm going to pull that fuse to make the dinging go away. Unfortunately, that fuse also powers the radio, so I'll have to take my discman with me for music purposes. What a pain in the ass.

Page Updates:
- added "Simply Nature" to Scribble


11/18/2004:

Made it through a whole day at work today (the first full day this week), despite feeling crappy through a good portion of it. I am feeling better tonight than I have all week, I think. Hopefully this feeling will continue, moving forward through this week and into the next.

Page Updates:
- updated Dragon-Rider page (Happenings section)


11/16/2004:

My weekend was spent in New London, CT, with Chris, Dave, Mark, Jen, and Wills. There was a lot of video gaming and magic playing, as is usual during our gatherings :) It was great to see everyone, it having been months since any previous viewings. Everyone had a good time, myself included, save for some stomach-sickiness due to greasy chicken on saturday night (that was just me, afaik). On some sort of plus side, this prompted me to try the new cherry flavored Pepto Bismol, which I had brought with me. I am happy to report it is actually quite tasty, a huge improvement over the taste of the original.

I felt pretty "bleh" all day sunday, and into monday. Decided to go to work anyway on monday; while there, felt feverish and icky, so took a 1/2-day and left at noon. Good decision on my part, I feel. I also took today (tuesday) off, as I was still feeling kinda crappy this morning. Not really anything specific; I don't really feel like I have a cold or the flu, I just feel really run down. I slept 12+ hours last night, and still woke feeling a bit tired - woke up late, at 9:00! Still feeling run down today. Did get out and do a few simple errands: trip to the bank, picked up a few movies at BlockBuster, got a haircut. Felt a little better after getting out; now I just feel "bleh" again. Hopefully another quiet night and a good sleep will allow me to go to work tomorrow. I've been wanting to have a day just for me for awhile now; just wish I felt better for it.

I dreamt last night of the gates weakening, and the demonic legions waiting beyond, waiting to rush forth and swarm over us and all those we love. We stood waiting for them, my friends, family, myself; we stood armed and waiting for the gates to open, and we were not afraid.


11/06/2004:

Another weekend in VT last weekend. We had visitors, and the resulting name lineup was a large mix of J's and D's: Jared, Jerry, Janet, Jason, Jody, Jovanna, Dennis, Diane, and Dave :) We spent a lot of time riding the ATVs (Jody and Jason hauled theirs up on a trailer, so we had 4 to use, total). It was a great deal of fun, though I was pretty sore afterwards; a lot of muscles got used that are not used very often.

A few weeks ago, I discovered - by following a link from a livejournal - meetup.com. It's a good place to find people of common interest in your area. On wednesday, I met and hung out with a few people I met on the site, as part of the Springfield Pagan Group. It was a great deal of fun, spending time with others of like mind, and talking about a variety of things, from our own experiences to politics and the state of the world. I look forward to the next time we get to meet :)


10/28/2004:

My new job is going very well. I'm enjoying the work; it is familiar enough to not be too stressing, while at the same time giving me many new things to learn and a sense of accomplishment each day. I impressed a lot of the supervisors there during my first week, and the praise they gave me certainly helped boost my self esteem :) Most new hires don't start taking calls on their own until they have been on the job for a few weeks. I started taking calls on my own the 4th day I was there. Got my first paycheck today; oh, happy paycheck. I have a job and it pays well. The commute isn't too bad (though the traffic sucks in the morning). I am pretty happy. Just need my girl here, and all would be just great :) Another 6 weeks until her next visit...

Spent last weekend in VT. Got to see Jeff, Chris, Jesse, my sister, and the rest of my family. It was a nice, relaxing time. I'm going back up this coming weekend. Some long-time friends of the family are visiting, and I wish to be there to see them. I'm sure some ATV-riding will ensue. Looking forward to it :)


10/19/2004:

I'll tell you, it's getting chilly outside. The damp just helps the chill sink further into my bones. Brr. Had to turn on the heat in my apartment last night, and again tonight. Guess it is that time of year...

My new job is going very well. Yesterday, I listened while others took calls, and took personal notes about each call, to get used the tools involved. Today, I listened while others talked, but I was the one taking notes and using the tools on the computer. Tomorrow, I'd like to start taking calls on my own. The tools available to me are fairly easy to learn; what remains is learning about the many pieces of hardware and software we support, and the best way for me to do so is to jump right in and start taking calls on them.

Those who look forward to seeing me online at various times during the day will probably be disappointed, now that I have started this job. I am at the computer all day, and therefore, when I return home, the computer is generally not where I wish to be. Even just typing this, the screen gets blurry before my eyes. Somedays I can tolerate the computer screen all day; other days, I just won't be up for it by the time I get home. Once I get my own logins for everything, and start sitting by myself and taking calls, I will be able to use AIM to communicate with some of you, while it is slow at work (afternoons are usually slower). Speaking of which, I'm still not sure what my final schedule is going to be yet. I didn't think weekends were available, but I was wrong about that. There are people who have weekend schedules. I am hoping I do not end up working weekends; I would prefer to have my weekends off. We'll see what kind of choices I have when the time comes. When I know, it'll be posted here.


10/16/2004:

Every once in awhile, my mind takes hold of a certain female celebrity and hangs on tight. I will dream about her once or twice a week for a month or two, and then she'll be let go. I'm not sure what brings this on, but when it happens, the dreams are so vivid that sometimes I am actually surprised to wake up and find that we are not actually close friends. I can only think of four such celebrities my mind has taken hold of. The first, about six years ago, was Jennifer Love Hewitt. Then came Katie Holmes, a year or so later. Eliza Dushku came after. Now it is Laura Prepon, who plays Donna on "That 70's Show". My mind does strange things to me.

Page Updates:
- added "Trapped by Promises" to Scribble. Not sure why I titled this one as so, but for lack of a better title, I kept the original.


10/14/2004:

I have a job! Travelers, the company I interviewed with on monday, called me yesterday and offered me the Help Desk job. Of course I accepted :) I start on Monday! Not sure what my schedule is going to be yet, but it will probably be either 9 - 6 or 10 - 7. Either is fine with me; not too early going in, not too late getting out. I have a job, and it's a tech job! *happy dance*


10/12/2004:

My dreams lately have consisted of two major things: 1) playing D&D; and 2) being late. When I am playing D&D, it is always my campaign. When I am late, it is always for school of some sort; the past couple of nights, it has been high school, complete with high school friends, who are also late for class. Hopefully when I get a job and a schedule of some sort, these dreams will go away. I really dislike being late for things, so the dreams of lateness are almost akin to nightmares for me.

Last wednesday, my Mom and I had a really nice discussion about religion and beliefs. Since that time, I have been thinking about what my beliefs are. When I picture the divine who watches over me, I see two glowing forms: one male, one female. I wish to give names to these forms, but as of yet no names are forthcoming. Meditation on this is in order, as for some reason the names are very important to me. I'll work it out. While I was talking to my Mom, I brought up how I thought I had fallen so far from Christianity, but sometimes I feel I haven't fallen that far at all. As a religious system, Christianity is out for me, for several reasons. I haven't been big on any particular religious system, ever, really. I have beliefs, but not religion. I felt throughout the weekend like I was on the edge of some kind of relgious revelation, but no revelation ever came. Or maybe it did, and I need to figure out what it is. The two glowing forms, perhaps. I don't know. I'll stop babbling now. When I have something more concrete than disjointed thoughts, I'll post it.

Page Updates:
- renamed "Sky" section of Pics to "Nature"
- added 2 pics to "Nature" section of Pics, both taken on sunday. Very pretty leaves
- created an "Other Animals" section in the "Animal Pics" section of Pics
- added 2 pics to "Other Animals", both taken over the weekend. The turkeys were seen by the side of the road while we were driving up the Okemo access road. The horse is out to pasture near my parents house. His name is Red. He keeps my Mom's horse company. I don't have any pictures of him yet.
- added 1 pic to Lynx's "Asleep" section - him sleeping in a shoebox
- added 1 pic to Lynx's general section - him relaxing on my wide windowsills


10/11/2004:

The weekend was good, if long and tiring. I headed up to VT on wednesday night. On thursday, I had an appointment with the surgeon who worked on my leg after the accident last year, for a follow-up. They took X-rays, and everything is healing nicely. I will be seeing the doctor again sometime in March, and at that time we will discuss the removal of the steel rod that runs through my left leg, knee to ankle. The shin bone is now mostly healed; there are just a few places that need to heal a bit more before we consider taking the rod out.

After the doctor's visit, my Mom and I went out for breakfast. At the restaurant, I saw Scott, an old friend of mine, whom I hadn't seen for at least 10 years. We chatted for a couple of hours, finding out we still had much in common. I have been invited to come game with him, his wife, and their gaming group when next I am in VT with some free time. I look forward to the time when I get to do so (they play in the World of Darkness). Speaking of the World of Darkness, I plan to start playing Kris' game this sunday, in which I will be the only werewolf amongst a group of vampires. Should be quite interesting :)

On saturday, we held a memorial service for my grandmother (my Mom's mom), who passed away in May of this year. It was a very good ceremony, and brought a measure of closure to what had been, since her death, a fairly open-ended ordeal. I wrote something in memory of her, and read it at the ceremony. It felt good to do so, and I know my words helped some of the others there.

On sunday, my uncle Phil, his wife Jamie, my Mom and Dad, and myself took a drive, to see if we could get some nice pictures of the changing leaves. Of course the day had to be overcast, rainy, and foggy. I got some decent shots from near the top of Okemo Mountain. I'll sort through them later, and post any that look good. After that drive, I returned to MA (another hour and 30 minutes or so of driving). I was really exhausted, and spent the evening relaxing; watched some TV, then played Morrowind for awhile.

I checked my cell phone voicemail while in VT, and I had received a call from someone at Travelers, an insurance company who I knew to have my resume. I gave her a call back today, and she pre-screened me for the Help Desk position they have open, then invited me to interview :) I had the interview today at 2 pm, and it went very well. They seemed impressed with my work experience, technical knowledge, and general mannerism. I am confident I will be offered the position soon; possibly even tomorrow. A real job! It's a temp job, but they're looking at a greater-than-6-months window, of course with the possibility of being hired as a full employee within or after that time. It's a 100% phone position, but it's help desk, so the calls all come from within the company; no outside customers to deal with. I am looking forward to the offer, and, ultimately, starting to work again :) Holy crap, I might actually be receiving a real paycheck sometime in the near future. That would be f***ing great!


10/2/2004:

My endoscopy was performed on thursday. Surprise, they didn't find anything abnormal. They did take a tissue sample for testing, but the doctor wasn't very hopeful that bit of testing would reveal anything very useful. I have been referred back to my primary care physician. We're going to try going at this from a different angle: with medicine designed to help take some of my anxiety away, which, at this point, is a definite cause of much of my discomfort when it comes to digesting my food. We'll see how that goes. I'll be more mellow, if anything. Like I'm real excitable as it is.

My car's inspection sticker expired yesterday. Oops. I know what I'm doing on monday. I could get it inspected today, but I'd probably have to wait a long time in an uncomfortable chair. So I'll just do it monday, when the chances of me having to sit in that uncomfortable chair for any large length of time will be greatly reduced.

The job search continues. If I haven't gotten any leads or opportunities by the end of this week, I'm going to start applying outside the tech sector. At this point, most any job would be better than no job. Something to pay bills, and something constructive to do with my time. Not that I don't try to be constructive around here. I do more writing, I work on my campaign, I try to study to get some more of my certifications. But I need something contructive to do that helps me pay the bills, and none of these things do that for me. We'll see what happens come the end of the week.

Page Updates:
- added "Healing Rain" to Scribble.


9/27/2004:

Today has been fairly lazy. I did some job searching, applying for a few more in the Hartford area. Hopefully someone will call me soon with a job offer. I did get a call this morning from a recruiter, but the job was too far away to be practical. The call gave me a burst of optimism, though, which was much-needed. Otherwise, I did some writing, and organized some of my other writings into a more practical order (by subject matter, rather than by date). Yeah...nothing much exciting from me today...except my new piece of work :)

Page Updates:
- added "Dark Consequence" to Scribble.


9/25/2004:

Page Updates:
- added "Meditation" to Scribble. This is a meditation I have used often in the recent past, to help myself relax and feel more healthy.
- added "Alleyway" to Scribble. This started with a single vision, of moonlight reflecting off a knife blade. That was last night. Today I wrote this.


9/24/2004:

My left ankle has been hurting for the past 3 days or so. I'm not sure what is wrong with it, why it has started hurting more this week. For those who aren't sure, my left leg is the one with the steel rod in it. The parts of my ankle that are hurting seem to be those near the bolts that hold the rod in place. If it isn't better by next week, I'm going to call my doctor's office up in VT and schedule an appointment to see him. I already have an appointment for October 7th, for a checkup and to have X-rays done, but if it doesn't stop hurting, I want to get it checked out sooner and make sure nothing is wrong. It has kept me from taking any nice walks in the past few days, and that annoys me, because the weather has been absolutely beautiful. I have gotten outside to read and enjoy the weather, but I like to take walks in it, and I just haven't been able to. *sigh*

I've come to some interesting realizations about my eating problems. The strangest being this new bit of information: I eat less well when in the company of others. It's odd but completely true. When I am alone, I eat much better (and my stomach feels much better) than when I am in the company of other people. Friends or complete strangers, it seems to make no difference at all. Now, this disturbs me to a great degree, because I love my friends, and I cannot think of any reason why being in their company should stress me out to any degree whatsoever, thereby making me feel less healthy. I'll write more on this after I've thought about it some.


9/23/2004:

Woke later than usual (10:30), feeling kind of...off. Can't really describe what I feel like; just off-kilter a bit for one reason or another. I've been up for a couple hours now, and don't really feel much different. I'll probably feel better after I accomplish something today, other than checking my email and my other daily sites, even if it's just some more work on my campaign world.

I decided to sign up for my own deviantART account yesterday, to share my writing with a wider audience, and allow an easier medium for my friends (friends on deviantART anyway) to drop little comments on my work. My journal will continue to be right here, in this location, and any work posted to deviant will most likely be posted here first (and if not first, then directly after). If you're looking for me on deviant: dhaga.deviantart.com.

Last week, one of Roland's friends was looking to give away a scanner. Since Roland already has (at least) one, he asked if I'd like it, and hey, free hardware, so I said sure. I hooked it up yesterday and played around with it for awhile. It works very well :) I've been making digital backups of my hand-drawn D&D maps with it, as I like to have digital backups of all my D&D stuff, just in case, and until now I could backup everything except the maps (unless I wanted to redraw them using a mapping program, but I prefer drawing them on graph paper, by hand). So, much happiness there. Got the world maps done yesterday; today or tomorrow I'll start on the dungeon maps. As an added bonus, Joanna can use the scanner when she comes to visit, if she so requires or wants to :)

I'm actually feeling a little better now. Hrm. Maybe I'll go work on my campaign for awhile. Working on a couple of new dungeons... :)


9/21/2004:

My computer and I spent some quality time together yesterday. I opened it up and dusted out the inside. I removed the defective 40GB drive and installed the new 120GB drive. Then I set to work reinstalling Win2000 and a good portion of my games and applications. The new drive is performing very well, and as a result both my computer and me are very happy :)

I spoke with Dave yesterday, and he confirmed the Walmart connectivity project has been completed. I wrote to Bill, my project lead, and asked him about any other projects they may have running in the area. He passed my question along to the management people, along with a glowing recommendation, outlining how well I did on the Walmart project :) Hopefully I will be contacted soon with information about the other projects they have work to do on. I explained the importance of getting back to me asap, as if they do not have further work for me, I will need to seek employment elsewhere.

Page Updates:
- added "The Two" to Scribble. It's a short bit of writing, composed sometime during my college years. There are a few misplaced lines in it that could probably use some editing, but as a whole I like it as it is :)


9/19/2004:

Well, that "something to keep an eye on" (i.e. hard drive issues) in my last post turned into a major annoyance for me. I decided to format C: and D:, and did so, after backing everything up. Reinstalled Win2000, then reinstalled a few apps onto D:. During a reboot, I received the message "One of your drives needs to be checked for consistency." That would be my good ole' D: drive again. Yep, look at those bad sectors. So the problem remains, and windows doesn't seem to have any qualms about trying to write to known bad sectors. My F: partition is part of the same physical drive as D:, and while it's not having consistency failures, I have seen some performance hits recently while gaming (F: is my games drive). So after a bit of thought, I decided a new hard drive was a good idea, as 1 physical disk is on its way out. Don't want to wait until it dies completely and I'm left without being able to retrieve my data. I ordered a new 120GB 7200RPM Western Digital drive, with 8MB buffer, from NewEgg.com. Got it for $87, with shipping. 3x the size of the drive I'm replacing. I'm pretty happy about that :) The drive should arrive on Monday, and then it's time to get my computer all fixed up and working as well as possible again :)

I learned last week that Junior Mints candies do not have anything in them that I can't eat, so I bought a box. Chocolate candy is good. It's been awhile since I've been able to have any. I can still only eat a couple candies at a time without feeling ill, but it's better than no candies :) They make good after-dinner snacks. And after-lunch... and just whenever I feel like it...


9/14/2004:

Today was quite better than yesterday, work-wise. I was in Bristol, CT this morning. I completed the job in just over 3 hours, which is pretty fast for this job (the Fuji techs who have been doing this for months usually come in around 4 hours per job). The lab in North Adams, where I was yesterday, called around noon. The IBM tech did come out and fix that problem machine, so I'll be driving back up there tomorrow to finish my work. I think I'll be in bed very early tonight; been feeling tired and generally "bleh" all day, despite a 1 hour nap a couple hours ago. I'm sure lots of sleep will fix me up good; it usually does :)

With all the ranting yesterday, I didn't get to mention a couple of amusing things I saw on my long drive. I'm tempted to start bringing my camera with me, but things like this come and go so quickly that I'd have to turn around, stop, take a picture, turn around, and then continue on my previous course. I'll just describe them instead. The first was a Chinese restaurant with the quite funny name of "We Happy". I laughed out loud when I saw it. That was on my way to the job in the very early morning. On the way home, I saw a billboard advertising either a politician or a law firm of some sort, with a man's face on it. I wasn't paying attention to what the billboard was actually advertising, as the man's last name was plastered across the top of the billboard in 2-foot high letters: "CAPELESS", to which my first thought was: "So, he's not Batman". Little things like this make my day so much nicer. At least it's a pretty drive up there. Even better because it's the one I'm making again tomorrow.

My computer has started having some issues. Portions of my D:\ drive are unreadable to: Norton AV, Norton Disk Doctor, and PerfectDisk. I've run boot-time scans using NDD, and after a serious amount of "file sector unreadable" messages, followed by a serious amount of reindexing, the problem remains. Each time I do this, the problem seems to get a little better, but not by alot. I've got it narrowed down to a 6 or 7 MB portion at this point. Unfortunately, PerfectDisk doesn't seem to have any "exclude" options when it comes to defragmenting, so I can't do anything about the fragmentation of that particular drive. Other drives (knock on wood) are working fine. I will probably (*sigh*) have to replace the drive at some point, but I'm hoping to avoid that for awhile. The main bitch isn't really the money -- hard drives are cheap enough to replace right now -- it's the reinstalling of everything, as that physical drive has all of my applications and games on it (2 partitions, D:, the Apps drive, being one of them). If it gets worse, I'll take steps of some sort; perhaps trying a format on D: first and see if that helps at all. Of course, that still means reinstalling a bunch of stuff, and probably messing up the registry to boot, but, well, such things happen. Not going to worry overmuch about it just now. Just something for me to keep an eye on.


9/13/2004:

Today's work experience can be summed up in one word: ridiculous. I drove 3 hours (round trip) to do 4 hours worth of work. The worst part is, I have to go back. When I first arrived on site, I noticed there didn't seem to be an RJ-45 jack where there should have been one. I called the cabling guys, and they informed me the cables hadn't been run in that store yet, but should be "by the end of the week". He couldn't get any more specific. Ok, well, I've been to a store previously that had the same issue; it doesn't stop me from performing the necessary software and hardware installs; it just prevents me from testing online connectivity. So I get the software install going on the main machine (the PIC), then replace the necessary hardware in the ADPC, and boot it off the Ghost bootable CD. I watch the usual screens come up, then a message flashes by: "Bad block(s), disk 0x1, drive:129, 1 sector(s) starting at 129...something", followed by a General Protection Fault, followed by the ghost software writing to the windows registry, even though it had not yet actually ghosted the machine. Grrrrreaaat.

Reboot, try again: same thing. Reboot with another copy of ghost software: same problem. Um, yeah. Reboot, get a BIOS error beep message (1 long, 2 short, which I learned later is a DMA error), followed by a little blue box stating, "No video feed. Please check signal." followed by a blank screen. Keyboard locked up at this point. But...but it was just working! Check connections, all are tight, try again: same problem. Reseat video board. Same problem. Reboot about 5 more times, and then it finally worked. Mentioned problems to staff person at photo lab; she said that issue has happened before, recently. Well, it's happening again. I can only get the display to function about once every 15 boots; and even when it does, the ghost doesn't work right. Yee-freakin'-haw.

So an IBM tech has been called to site to investigate the problem and fix the video issue. I also requested he run a hard drive diagnostic if at all possible, because that bad sector thing just isn't good. Hopefully he'll just replace the hard drive, too, and then I can ghost it and all will be good. I got the majority of what I need to do done, anyway, but I still have to go back, probably on wednesday (I'm in CT tomorrow), to finish up the job. I guess at least I have something to do on wednesday now...

On a brighter note, I got to talk with Joanna for awhile last night before I dropped off to sleep. I got her feeling happier than she was, and that, in turn, makes me very happy :)

I also had a pleasant conversation with my friend Amy P today, whom I haven't spoken with since, oh, last December or so. I may get to see her sometime in the next month, at her new place out near Boston :)


9/6/2004:

Spent the weekend in VT, visiting my parents. I relaxed a lot over the weekend, and it felt very good. Sat outside with my Mom on saturday, just enjoying the weather and each other's company. That pretty much sums up my whole weekend, actually. Relaxing, enjoying. Yeah. Took a nice ride on the horses on sunday. Got to ride my Mom's new horse, named Whiskey. I mostly rode Red, another horse that stays in the pasture with Whiskey. He's a big, powerful morgan horse, with coloration similar to Tonto, the horse I grew up with, who passed away a couple of years ago. My ass is still sore from the ride; it had been a couple of years since I'd really ridden. I look forward to doing it again, hopefully soon :)

Work is going very well. I should be receiving my first paycheck this week. Yay, paycheck :) The only thing that gets a little annoying at work is the customers, whom I really don't have anything to do with. I feel like Dante from the movie Clerks. His line is, "I'm not even supposed to be here today." My line would be, "I don't even work here." Sure, I'm working there, at Walmart, but it doesn't mean I work there. At least 10 people a day ask me where they can find such-and-such and item. Most of the time, I'm wearing a Walmart badge that says "VENDOR" on it; but of course no one pays attention; they see the badge, and instantly think I'm employed there. Ah, well. Really, it's more funny than annoying, and I usually chuckle about it as I explain I'm only there to work on the computers, and I don't really have much of an answer for them. The Photo Center Manager I was working with on friday suggested I should just help them. So what if I'm wrong? I'll be gone in a few hours anyway. Heh. Nah, I'll just stick with "I don't really work here. I'm just the computer guy." Yay for being the computer guy :)

Awww, yeah ;)


:: how jedi are you? ::


8/30/2004:

Spent friday and saturday at home, by myself, at my own choosing. I enjoyed the solitude for a couple of days. Sunday, we played D&D at Pete's place. Game went well. Robin (my character) took a large amount of damage during the session, much due to his own butterfingers. He climbed a cliff, twice, to get a look at the surrounding area. Both times, on the way back down, he failed his climb check, and took at least half his hit points worth of damage. Ah well. The dangers of being the rogue/scout.

Health was pretty bad over the weekend, especially on saturday. Doing better today, as far as I can tell. Did get a call from Fuji this morning; I now have 4 stores to upgrade this week, one each for the days remaining this week. This is good. Work is good. Work means better experience at my job, and money. Money is good. Money means I can pay my bills, and stay living where I am, which is what I want. Yay.

Took my car back to Midas today. I didn't drive it enough over the weekend, so they still cannot determine where the leak is. Was told to drive more this week, then come back in a few days. Now that I have work, I will certainly be driving it. This is good.

Finished Doom3 late last week. End boss was very impressive, if not very difficult. Now that I've completed the game on Marine difficulty, I have unlocked Nightmare difficulty. I'm going to try and get back through the game on this much-more-difficult setting. We'll see how that goes. I'm still working through my second bout of Dungeon Siege; I'm about 35 hours in at this point. Just me, with 4 pack mules for company. At least they don't complain when the going gets rough.

Page Updates:
- added "Mind at Play" to Scribble
- updated the Link of the Now


8/27/2004:

An overview of the past few days:
Wednesday: get up at 4 am, after just 5 hours of sleep (slept 7:30 - 9:30, then couldn't get back to sleep until 1 am). Do morning stuff. Drive 1 hour, 45 minutes. Work 7 - 2:30. Drive 1 hour, 45 minutes home. Crash. Turn out lights at 6:40 pm.
Thursday: get up at 4:15 am, much better rested than the previous day. Do morning stuff. Drive 1 hour, 30 minutes. Work 7 - 1:30. Drive 1 hour, 30 minutes home. Nap for 1 hour. Feel like crap upon waking, but get up anyway. Decide not to go to class. Veg on the couch for hours. Read for awhile, then...actually watch TV. The Simpsons, That 70's Show, The King of Queens. Feel better after relaxing. Lights out at 9:30 pm. Finally get to sleep at 11:30. Wake at 7:45 am, feeling rested.

So I'm sort of getting used to getting up early again. I got tired again around 10 am, but just ignored it. I don't really start to wake up until around noon (or so it feels). When I'm working, it's not so bad. I have things to occupy my attention, and I don't notice my own fatigue so much, which was good, especially on wednesday. I used to do this every day; I can do it again.

The job is going well. It's not hugely challenging, but that is ok. I'm learning about new hardware and software, which is always fun for me. Plus I get a change of scenery everyday, as I'll be at a different location each day. My training was just the two days. I will hopefully actually start work next week sometime. I was supposed to work in Pittsfield on wednesday, but due to a problem, that store is now not being upgraded. I'm sure once the project gets more into full swing, and all my paperwork gets done at the head office, I'll have a more steady supply of work. I've also now got an "in" with Fuji, the company for whom we're doing the work. My trainer of the past few days works for Fuji, and he's going to bring it up to his boss that there is a tech here (me), willing to travel around the country, doing these upgrades. I already received the same offer through CGS, but I figure that multiple sources pointing to the same destination can only help me. We'll see what comes of it :)

Health is still up and down. I suppose that is to be expected, what with my fluctuating sleep schedule. I'm going to try and be up by 9 am in the coming days, hopefully smoothing out health problems in the process. Then if I have to get up at 5 or 6 am on some morning, it won't be nearly the struggle it was on wednesday.

In other news, my car started leaking oil a couple of days ago. I noticed it wednesday after I got back to my apartment, but I didn't have the energy to do anything about it then. I took it into Midas this morning. They cleaned all the oil off the bottom of the car (there was quite a bit), then told me to drive it around on the weekend, and come back on monday or tuesday of next week, so they can figure out where the leak is coming from. It's not leaking very fast, thankfully. If it was, they would have been able to see where it was coming from. Mixed blessing, I guess.


8/23/2004:

My stomach continues its cycle of good and bad. I felt wonderful last week; better than I have in months. On saturday, that all abruptly ended, and I felt really crappy for most of the day, despite the visitation of Kris and Roland. On sunday, after 11-some hours of sleep, I was feeling marginally better, and continued to feel better throughout the day. About this I am happy. Today, I feel alright. Not great, but not bad. I can feel good about it not being bad.

Other than health issues, the weekend was very good. As mentioned, Kris and Roland came over on saturday. We played some Magic, watched Face/Off, and then tried out my new game, called Greed Quest. It is very silly and very fun :) We played D&D on sunday, my campaign. And it happened again: Roland's character was killed in battle. "Eviscerated" really sums up quite well what happened to him, as he end up with -20-something hp. Roland has played 3 characters in this campaign so far, and all of them have died once. Khim, the dwarven monk, died and was not raised. Arahad, the human cleric, died and was raised, then later left the party of his own accord. Kyle, his most recent character, lasted 3 sessions before getting killed. A raising will be attempted, and, as far as I know, he will choose to be raised, rather than remain dead. It's a dangerous world; I have never claimed otherwise. Good thing, too; I'd be lying if I said it wasn't.

As for my job, I did receive an email today. I start my training on wednesday, at 7 am. The training location is out near Boston, so I'll be leaving here around 5 am. Ugh, yes, but I'm looking forward to it, because...I have a job! Plus, my actual work locations will be closer to where I live, at least cutting travel time by 30-45 minutes. Training is for two days, and then I start working on the stores in western and central MA. I'm still not sure what my hours will be when I actually start working. I'll find out very soon. Yay, job! Though my sleep schedule is going to be totally screwed up for a couple weeks. Ah well :)

Page Updates:
- added "She Stands" to Scribble.


8/19/2004:

Confirmation is mine :) I got the job, and I start on monday or wednesday of next week. Yay, job!


8/17/2004:

Been a busy few days. The rest of my weekend was very enjoyable. Kris and Roland came over sunday before game, and brought me more gifts -- yay, gifts! Thank you! Then we headed over to Pete's to play in his campaign for several hours. It was a very enjoyable session. We had to end in the middle of a battle (just like in my campaign last week), so at least we know what we'll be doing right away when we start next time :)

I got some unexpected news on sunday. Apparently, my unemployment has run out. I was under the impression that I would be receiving unemployment until I was done with school, in 3 weeks. I called the unemployment office, and was informed that the unemployment extension for attending school covers me for 18 weeks, or until school ends, whichever comes first. My 18 weeks came first. So, now I have no income.

However, I did receive a phonecall today, and I may have a job starting on monday (yay)! It will be a contract job, lasting 3 to 4 weeks, but it pays really well, and it would be a nice income to have while I continue searching for a full-time job. The job is a Win2000 rollout project at Walmarts in western MA. It deals with hardware and software installs, and minimal training of store employees in using the software. In other words, something that is right up my alley :) The project recruiter I talked to was impressed with my resume, and with my answers to his technical questions. From what I can tell, I pretty much have the job, but I'll need confirmation, which I should get tomorrow. Yay, job! And in my field!

So, yeah, happy birthday to me. Things are looking up :)

Page Updates:
- added "Sick" to Scribble. I wrote it while I was in college. Most of it does not apply anymore (thankfully), but I thought it an emotional piece of writing, so there it is.
- fixed the sidebar, so my guestbook link is no longer hidden (thanks, Mir :) )


8/14/2004:

The past few days I have felt the best I have in months. I have woken from sleep feeling refreshed and energetic. I have been able to eat more than just PB&J day in and day out. I have felt motivated and creative, and as such I have created things (mostly D&D related, though I have written a few other thoughts down, perhaps working towards some more poetry). I can only hope such things continue. I try to be optimistic, but sometimes it's just plain difficult, what with sickness randomly sneaking up on me at times, with no warning. I guess that's what sneaking is...

My parents came down today to visit for awhile. They got here around 4, and left around 9:30 or so, so we had several hours to talk and relax. It was good. My birthday is coming up in 2 days, so they also brought my presents down to me, and Mom made me a cake! I love my Mom, and I love her cooking :) I received some very nice gifts. I now have Pirates of the Caribbean, Finding Nemo, and Fight Club on DVD. I also got 2 books: Snow Crash and Cryptonomicon. I plan to start reading the former when I finish the trilogy I'm working my way through. A close friend of my late grandmother sent me a very nice knife. It has a sharp, curving blade, and the pommel is shaped as a horse's head. It is a beautiful addition to my collection. I also received an enchanting, hand-painted dragon statue, with a clear crystal base. It has a separate base, as well, that the statue sits on, which shines light up through the crystal in a myriad of different colors, everchanging. It is an exquisite item. I love it.

After my parents left, I headed over to Blackwatch's place, to hang out with him, Sarah, Ian, Kris, and Roland. Jenn, Nathan, and Sam and his girlfriend were there when I first arrived, but they had to leave soon after. We played a bit of Mario Cart on the gamecube, then played a few good hands of UNO. It was a fun, relaxing evening :) Tomorrow, we play D&D (Pete's campaign). My rogue, Robin, is now second level, and I really enjoy playing him. He is developing into an interesting character (as all the characters are).

Page Updates:
- added "She Walks" to Scribble. This is another one of my favored pieces among my collection.
- added more screenshots to the Doom 3 section.


8/12/2004:

Page Updates:
- added a Doom3 section to the Game Screenshots in Pics. There are pictures of creatures and environments there, to let those who haven't played get a feel for just how damn great the game looks. The screenshots don't do the game justice as far as creepiness goes, but they show off the visual effects nicely. I will be taking more as I progress through the game.
- also added a section for Dungeon Siege. I am playing through the game a second time, this time just using one hero. I am still constantly amazed by how beautiful the game is, so figured I'd share some choice screenshots with everyone :)


8/11/2004:

My dreams were murky, dark, and mostly disturbing. I slept hard, spending a total of 12 hours in bed (2 of those hours were spent trying to get to sleep; the first hour when I finally turned out the lights at 2:30 am; the 2nd hour after being woken by a phonecall at 10 am). Again I woke with a headache, feeling less than refreshed for all the sleeping I did. I've felt zoned out for most of the day. I couldn't concentrate long enough on my studies to get any real studying done, nor did I go to class. I did call the doctor with whom I have an appointment on 9/30, to see if he had any ideas as to what I could do, with my digestive problems seeming to get worse rather than better lately. As before, he didn't have much for ideas, except to take pepto bismol if I was feeling really bad, which is what I do anyway. I really dislike the taste of it, but it does settle my stomach, most of the time. I didn't expect much for answers, since there haven't been any tests since the last ones, but thought it couldn't hurt to call anyway. *sigh*

I did get out for a short walk around the neighborhood this evening. It is pleasantly cool out, if still quite humid, having recently rained. It was an enjoyable walk. The verdict is still out as to whether it helped me specifically, but it certainly didn't hurt any. I wish there weren't a bunch of little bugs flying around outside, or I'd open my windows and let some fresh air in. Those little black flies come in through my screens, though, and bite me, causing me to itch. So A/C it is for now. I like the summer and all, but I am looking forward to the cooler weather (and less bugs) of fall.

Ugh, only 7:45 pm and I already feel like I could sleep more. I think getting to bed earlier tonight would be a good idea. Again, don't think it would hurt any.


8/10/2004:

Doom3 did arrive at my door yesterday around noon. I got it installed and running during the day, then played it after class, in the dark. Doom3 is creepy. Zombies lurching out of darkened corridors, imps popping ceiling panels and then leaping down to prey upon me, slashing my face with their claws and burning me with fireballs. The first imp I saw scared the hell out of me. I wouldn't say the 15 or 20 I've seen since then have diminished that feeling any. They still scare me as they swarm out of the darkness, bent on my destruction. This is not a run-and-gun game. Their are many dark corners and corridors that need to be investigated with a flashlight before they are passed by, else some malicious creature slash your side open as you creep past. The ambient sounds are very well done, as are the realistic lighting effects. Zombies moan in the darkness as they approach, while the pinky demons roar and charge, trying to eat your face off even as you fire round after round into their armored hides. There is a lot of tense creeping around, jumping at every sound, usually followed by frantic firing when you realize that you are not alone in the darkness; somehow a zombie has crept up on you, and is now slashing open your back, while four-legged, two-headed creatures crawl along the walls of the corridor towards you. Also, some crates, boxes, and barrels are moveable. This can be used to your advantage, as mobile cover, or mass destruction for your enemies (explosive barrels). Sometimes it adds to the creepiness, however. Last night, as I was creeping around an office, I encountered a pair of zombies. I shredded them with my shotgun, then took a couple of steps backwards, backing into a tray on wheels, which rolled across the floor, rattling. The sound almost made me jump out of my skin, as I whirled on it, almost filling it full of holes before I realized it was just a tray. I love the game, and I've only been playing it for a couple of hours so far. I look forward to playing some more later.

My parents were asking me what I would like to do when they come down to visit me for awhile on saturday. I've figured out what I want to do. I want to spend an entire day doing anything, and not feeling sick at all. Days like that have numbered few in the past weeks. Even weekends aren't safe for me anymore. I felt pretty wretched early saturday afternoon, and also for awhile on sunday. I left class early yesterday, feeling unhealthy. I was in bed by 1 last night, and slept about 12 hours. Apparently I needed sleep. Worst part is, I don't really feel much better today. I woke with a headache, which has thankfully gone now, but I still feel "zoned out", unable to concentrate for long on much of anything. I'm going to forego attending class tonight, but hope to get some studying done here. Now that I have my MCP certification, I want to go on and get my MCSA before I forget how to use Windows 2003 Server. I also need to do some job searching. I did some yesterday, without much luck. I did get two phonecalls from recruiters yesterday, who thought I might be interested in jobs they had. One was a supervisor position for a financial company; the other was a financial advisor position. Neither of the positions was the least bit technical, which is where I really want to be, what with all this schooling and test-taking I've been doing in the past 9 months. Hopefully one of these days I'll get a call from someone who needs a network or desktop admin, who doesn't need me to start immediately, and can wait a couple of weeks, so I can get done with school.

Hrm. Just stood up to go get something out of my backpack. Apparently, standing up is bad. Got immediately dizzy. *sigh* I just don't know anymore.

Page Updates:
- added "My Wish" to Scribble


8/6/2004:

Well, still no Doom3. It shipped wednesday, so I had hoped to have it today. It will probably come tomorrow. I hope so.

I'm getting pretty tired of this whole anxiety thing. I've been an anxious person for quite some time now, but lately it's just getting worse. I had a panic attack on wednesday, on my way to buy Lynx more food. I almost had another one today, but I pushed it away with some deep breathing and force of will. So my stomach got all tight and sick-feeling, but I didn't actually panic. *sigh* If it's not one thing, it's another.

It's been a beautiful couple of days here. I didn't get to get outside much yesterday, but did so today for awhile, and polished another one of my swords. I now have my fan in the window, instead of running the A/C. I much prefer the fresh air. Maybe I'll take a walk later. Or maybe I'll sit in front of my computer and work on more D&D stuff, or play some more Dungeon Siege. Or maybe I'll read some more (I'm working through David Eddings' The Tamuli trilogy for the 3rd time). Or maybe I'll do all of it. *shrug*

Page Updates:
- added "Love is a Weapon" to Scribble


8/3/2004:

Woohoo :) I passed my exam today, with an 828, and am now a Microsoft Certified Professional :) Now I need to get studying for the next one -- 70-290, the first of my MCSA exams. Maybe I can start in on that tomorrow or the next day. I also need to start job hunting in a more serious manner, to hopefully have something lined up for when I get done with class in September. For today, though, some relaxation is in order (and class later, of course).

Page Updates:
- added "Sensual" to Scribble
- updated Dragon-Rider page (Happenings section)


7/31/2004:

Much was accomplished last night. My bathroom and kitchen were cleaned and are now shiny. I reorganized my two biggest closets. I broke down some boxes that I had kicking around, stowing them in my closet in case I need them later. I did some more work on my D&D stuff. I got another 3 monsters converted to 3rd Ed, which finished off my list for another compendium. I may get to start on another today :)

Today, I got up relatively early (for me), at 11 am. I did this of my own accord, with no alarm or anything. I dreamt of Joanna. Imagine my surprise. She called me soon after I got up; she had a safe, uneventful trip, and is back in Canada now. I am happy she made it with no trouble. She was going to sleep, but will be calling me again in a few days. Yay :) After I talked to her, I showered and then cleaned some more. I vacuumed up around here, then organized some more stuff. I think I may wash the linoleum floors later. They're overdue.

Roland and Kris are coming over later. I'm looking forward to it. Magic: TG is planned, as is some Star Wars Monopoly, and probably watching Return of the Jedi. Also going to finally build my werewolf character for Kris' World of Darkness campaign. *grin I love my friends.

I think there was more, but I forgot what it might have been.

Page Updates:
- added "Exposed" to Scribble


7/30/2004:

She is gone from here now. Bus left at 6:15. She left a little empty space behind, but it is her physical presence that is gone; the rest of her is always with me, heart and soul. I feel restless. I suppose that is natural. Will probably do some cleaning in a little bit, after I get something to eat. Something to keep myself busy for awhile. Probably be gaming later, for the same reason.

Is overcast and humid outside. The humidity is actually lessening. I wish it would rain. Thunder and lightning would be great. If it'd do that, I might even go stand out in it for awhile and physically enjoy it. We'll see what happens. Time for some food...

Page Updates:
- replaced pics of Joanna with much better ones. Also added pics of Mir (left) and Kris playing (Joanna can be seen on the far right, in red). All this is in the Friends section of Pics.
- added "Alfred Chicken" to the list.


7/27/2004:

Turns out my car problems had to do with the transmission lines. One of them broke, and as a result, the car was leaking transmission fluid. The broken line is currently being replaced; they should be done with it in the next 1/2 hour or so. Then I can go get my car, and get to class this evening.

*edit* Well, it's 5:50 pm, and Midas just called. They got the transmission line installed, but still need to put the brackets back on and road-test it, and they don't have time to do that tonight. So I can't get my car back until tomorrow. So no class for me tonight, either. Maybe I'll make it for one day this week...

In brighter news, I continue to have new inspiration regarding my D&D campaign, and the world in which it is based. I worked out details on a few more cities over the past few days, and plan on doing more tonight. Looks like I have some time now.

I did schedule my MCP exam today. I'll be taking it next tuesday. Might as well do some studying on that tonight, too, as I apparently won't be doing Security+ stuff (what we're currently doing in class).

Page Updates:
- finished "Astyanax", so added it to the list.


7/26/2004:

Weekend went pretty well. Joanna and I helped Blackwatch move on saturday, though I didn't get to help as much as I'd hoped. I didn't sleep well at all the previous night, and I was wiped out. After we finished the first load of stuff, I went home and crashed, sleeping like the dead for 2 hours. After that, I felt much better. My parents came down saturday evening, and we went out to dinner at the Longhorn Steakhouse. The food there is very good, and they have a large variety of meats to consume. After dinner, we rented The Jerk, at my Dad's request. I hadn't seen the movie in years. There was much laughter.

My parents returned on sunday morning, to say hi and chat for awhile before they headed back to VT. My Mom baked me some delicious cookies, which Joanna and I adore :) Awhile after they left, Kris and Roland showed up, and we proceeded to Pete's place to play my D&D campaign. The session went pretty well. Lots of changes took place. Fahlin decided he wished to retire from adventuring, and Arahad decided to go back home. Grey, a tiefling who wields a wicked spear, joined up with the party. Kyle, a very stealthy human proficient with a spiked chain, will be traveling with the party on their next adventure, and may also end up joining them. There was a lot of roleplaying, and not much combat. There will be much more combat next session, I am sure, as the party travels north, across the desert, to destroy a large group of mechanical spiders bent on destroying the world.

This week has not started off terribly well. My car has been having steering trouble for a few days, so I took it down to Midas today. Seems there is some sort of hydraulic pressure problem between the power steering pump and the engine. They need to run some tests, so I decided to leave it with them overnight, and they'll have some sort of answer for me tomorrow. I have opted out of going to class tonight, even though we are starting a new book. I feel that missing the night will not set me back too far; I can catch up on the reading tomorrow or the next day. I did call Vue and get Microsoft linked to my account, so I can schedule my MCP exam. I plan to take it next monday. So that is good, anyway. *sigh* I hope the car fix will not be too expensive. Will see what they say tomorrow, and not worry to much about it now.

Page Updates:
- added "Coming Home" to Scribble. It's one of my favorite pieces, I think. Has a songlike quality to it.


7/23/2004:

I'm feeling better this weekend than I was during the week. Actually got up at 12:15 today. That's pretty close to morning, which is pretty different for me (especially without setting an alarm to do so). Tomorrow I'll be getting up earlier, to help Blackwatch and his family move to their new, much more spacious place of residence :)

Lots of page updates today. Got motivated to change some stuff around. I like the way it turned out. Also posted some more writing. I am hoping that posting more of my work will inspire me to write some new stuff. Most of my imagination is still going towards my D&D campaign. I can't really post any of that stuff here yet, as alot of it is future planning stuff for my PCs and such, but I hope to eventually write a story based on my campaign, which I would be happy to post here for your reading pleasure :) Currently, that is probably in the far-flung future, but it is certainly a possibility :)

Doom3 ships on August 3rd, and I'm very excited about it. It's the most excited I've been about any game in a long while. I guess this is unsurprising, considering how much I have always loved Doom and Doom2. I even went so far as to preorder it, so it'll come directly to my apartment :) Ooooo, gaming goodness, so soon, so soon!

Took a quiz (thanks, Kris):

Your Ultimate Roleplaying Purity Score
Category	Your Score	Average
Hacklust	44.34% Will kill for XP	53.4%
Sensitive Roleplaying	67.09% Will talk after everyone important's been killed	54.3%
GM Experience	53.62% Puts the players through the wringer	69.3%
Systems Knowledge	90.68% Played in a couple of campaigns	90.2%
Livin' La Vida Dorka	63.22% Goes nuts on the weekends	62.9%
You are 65.39% pure Average Score: 68.6%
Take The Ultimate Roleplaying Purity Test and see how you match up!

Page Updates:
- took the bold type off the Links page. Looks better I think.
- reorganized Links page. Removed some webcomics, reordered tech links section, made a humor section for non-webcomics. Also removed some of the links from Previous Links of the Now and added them directly to the Links page, for better visability.
- updated Dragon-Rider page (Happenings Section)
- added "Anger" to Scribble


7/21/2004:

Woke up this morning feeling irritated and violent. Really felt if anything even so much as annoyed me, I would lash out at them. I showered, sat down for awhile, thought, went out shopping. I feel much better now. I know there has been fighting in the realms and sometimes that makes me feel violent and edgy in this world, so I'm sure that had a hand in it. Also, my stomach has been feeling pretty bad this week, making me irritable. Plus I didn't sleep well last night. Every time I'd settle into comfortable sleep, I'd wake up. Between 4 and 7 a.m. I must've woken up at least 6 times. After that, I slept a little better. I feel mostly rested, anyway. Guess all that piled up could lead to irritation (not irrigation, like I almost typed there). Well, I feel better now, anyway; plus writing about it helps to clear it from my system.

Made a list yesterday, of all the original NES games I've finished. Most of them were finished on the NES system itself, but a few were done on an emulator. I'm still working on adding to the list. Zelda II was just added a couple days ago, which prompted me to compose the list. There's something relaxing about playing old-school NES games, and I've been doing it quite a bit lately, amidst continued planning of my D&D campaign. The red folder continues to grow...

Page Updates:
- added "4Fs" to Scribble


7/19/2004:

Weekend in NH went decently. It was great to see Jeff and Chris again. Unfortunately, my stomach decided to be sickly again through most of the weekend, so once again I lived mostly on PB&J sandwiches, and spent alot of time sitting down. Thankfully, Jeff was up for the same, so that's what we did. Watched some movies on saturday: Ghostbusters, The Butterfly Effect, and Timeline. All good.

Back in MA now and feeling a bit better. Stomach was pretty good last night; is kinda iffy today and into tonight. Hopefully it'll get better as the week goes on. I don't plan on traveling anywhere for the next month or so, and I hope that'll help me continue to be relaxed, and thus feel better. Started class back up tonight. This is our last week (thankfully) of MCSE. Next week, we start on Security+, which, by all accounts, is pretty easy. After that we'll do Linux+, which we're all looking forward to. I need to get on the job search wagon, here. This week I hope to do some better searching than I have been so far this summer. Need to get that list of local jobs from CTC, too...

I think I judge too harshly -- or too quickly -- sometimes. Made a few comments about things that bother me about other people's DMing styles. But then I got to thinking that if I ever get into a corner in my own campaign, and need to do up some stuff on the fly, I may be effectively playing the part of the hypocrite, and that's not what I wish at all. Just some thoughts, and thereby more unnecessary stress. *sigh*

And my AC unit in my living room started leaking water last night. Time to call maintenance and see how long it takes them to get back to me this time.

Page Updates:
- updated Dragon-Rider page (Happenings Section)
- updated the Link of the Now
- added Blackhaze9 to the Friends List on Links page


7/15/2004:

Update to let people know I'm doing ok. My stomach has been much better this week. I hope it continues to be so. Joanna is all healthy again (yay). Feeling more optimistic about my health now that I don't feel like absolute crap all day every day. Funny how that works.

Played Pete's campaign on sunday. Much fun. Hung out last night with Joanna, Kris, Roland, and (surprise) Miranda. Played some Magic: TG with Kris. Played Cosmic Wimpout with everyone. Took some funny pictures (will post later). Traveling up to NH this weekend to visit Jeff and Chris. Looking forward to it. Not too far to drive, and should be very relaxing. No pressure. Good.

Haven't studied at all this week. Think that alone did me a world of good. No worrying about class or tests. I'll get them done. Spent a good amount of time working on my campaign. Got another dungeon done. Expanded the world a bit. Rolled up encounters and treasure. I like rolling dice. Meant to work on my runic studies more, as that stopped a couple weeks ago. Didn't. Hope to start up again soon. Watched Swordfish again tonight. Joanna hadn't seen it yet. Good movie. Don't feel so bad about not accomplishing much this week. Helps motivate me to get stuff done next week. Maybe I'll even study up and take my MCP (XP) test soon. Would be a good thing to do. But I'm still on vacation, and I'm not going to think about that just now.

Page Updates:
- updated Links page. Added LJ "Friends List" section. Was going to add reipaniks and sempiternus there, as well, but I don't know if they use their LJs anymore.


7/9/2004:

Today is much, much better! Joanna is feeling much better than she was yesterday. Taking her off the prescribed pain pills seems to have done the trick, as her stomach isn't upset near as much anymore. Now we just need the penicillin to do its work, and she'll be good. She still needs rest, but is able to get up and around much better than earlier this week. I'm so happy that she's feeling better :) She's on her way back to being the healthy, bouncy, happy girl she usually is :)

On a note for myself, I got some good D&D work done last night, converting more creatures over from 2nd Ed. to 3rd Ed. Finished 3 full conversions, and got some more campaign ideas worked out. Hopefully I can get those ideas down on paper today. I have some mapping that needs to be done. I hope to convert some more creatures over today as well. I'd also like to continue writing on the story I've started to build around my current campaign, but not sure if I will get much done on that today. Would rather plan for future campaign sessions :)


7/8/2004:

Worry. Exhaustion. Those are the words of this week (and trailing back into last week as well). On thursday of last week, Joanna started getting a sore throat. Saturday evening, while in VT, it was noted that she had white spots on her throat. Mom thought it was probably the start of tonsilitis. On tuesday, she was feeling pretty bad, so I took her to the ER. A couple hours later, Dr. Pope confirmed that she has tonsilitis. Prescribed penicillin for it, plus pain medicine.

She doesn't seem to be getting much better. Some of the medicine is making her sick to her stomach. The penicillin needs to be taken, but I suggested she try taking something more generic for the pain, and see if her stomach feels better. Should know later this evening if that's the case. I hope it is.

With all this going on, I am exhausted. I worry about Joanna a lot. I really dislike seeing her feel unwell. I cleaned off my altar tonight and performed a little ritual, lighting candles for her health. I will probably do more later, applying some runic healing magick as well. I need to do something. She says I am taking good care of her, and I know I am, but I wish there was more I could do. If I was healthier, I'd take on her sickness myself, but I cannot risk that; I haven't been very healthy this past month myself. I'm not sick in the same way...just, my stomach isn't getting much better. I may feel better when she gets better. Less worry would certainly help.

There is happier news. The weekend, despite Joanna feeling unwell (it didn't get really bad until tuesday), was very fun. Went to VT to visit my parents. Got to hang out with Jesse, Jeff, and Jeff's girlfriend Chris, who is very nice, and cute too :) Hope to hang out with the two of them (Jeff and Chris) again next weekend. Uncle David and Aunt Lisa had their annual 4th of July party on Saturday. We lit off our own fireworks, as usual, and had a great time. Afterwards, Jeff, Jesse, Joanna, Chris, and I went back to my parents' house and lit off some little fireworks of our own. Finished the night up with a couple rounds of pool, followed by some comfortable (if not terribly restful) sleep. My exhaustion started to kick in on sunday, and I'm still feeling it a bit today. I didn't go to class tuesday or today. Only went for 1/2 a night last night. Just couldn't concentrate at all. I have next week off, and I hope it does me some good. I have no set plans all week, and hope to get a lot of relaxing done.

On monday, we got some great D&D playing in. Ran my campaign for around 10 hours. The party fought a good fight, suffered the death of a PC, and got transported off to another plane of existence. Quite the adventure :) I can't wait until we play again. We have plans to play Pete's campaign on sunday. I look forward to it. Hopefully we'll hit 2nd level :)

Took a quiz yesterday:

You are a Spiritualist. Your magic flows from the
primal forces of the cosmos. You could be a
gentle Healer, a miraculous Prophet or a
spirit-summoning War-mage with the strong link
your soul provides to the realms beyond
reality. You have preternatural abilities,
intutively sensing the personality of people
you meet and discerning events yet to happen.
You enhance your aura with meditative pursuits.
You are a good judge of character but your
idealism or morality can confuse others.

Which Magical Order Are You In?
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Page Updates:
- updated the Link of the Now